Newtonian&Tesconian Laws of Motion

Newton’s First law
There exists a set of inertial reference frames relative to which all particles with no net force acting on them will move without change in their velocity. This law is often simplified as "A body persists its state of rest or of uniform motion unless acted upon by an external unbalanced force." Newton's first law is often referred to as the law of inertia.

Tesconia’s First law
A Shelf Stacker will persist their state of rest until external unbalanced Manager gives them a kick up the arse.

Newton’s Second law
Observed from an inertial reference frame, the net force on a particle of constant mass is proportional to the time rate of change of its linear momentum: F = d(mv)/dt. This law is often stated as, "Force equals mass times acceleration (F = ma)": the net force on an object is equal to the mass of the object multiplied by its acceleration.

Tesconia’s Second law
The force required to move an 11 stone Shelf Stacker at 4mph.
124.8975216N = 69.8532kg x 1.788 (m/s² ) : Kick up the arse.

Newton’s Third law
Whenever a particle A exerts a force on another particle B, B simultaneously exerts a force on A with the same magnitude in the opposite direction. The strong form of the law further postulates that these two forces act along the same line. This law is often simplified into the sentence, "To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction."

Tesconia’s Third law
Kick up the arse=124.8975216N ~ Punch in face=124.8975216N*




*This is, of course, metaphorical. Wouldn't freedom of speech be a wonderful thing? And yes, I know that the numbers need their bottoms wiped but this is the reason why I'm stacking shelves in a supermarket.
My last job was in banking.